When I was about 10 years old, I met a girl in Gallina, New Mexico, where my parents were teaching summer school. She was the daughter of the superintendent and was short in stature. We were immediately drawn to each other because ... we were the only girls our age "in town" that summer! Moreover, I was particularly attracted to her because I was just a smidgen taller and because I was also a tiny person, I felt like a giant around her which was a first-of-a-kind experience for me. She and I spent a lot of time together, sharing our concern for stray baby kittens and sharing our dreams of the future. Me, I wanted to work with animals, perhaps even as a jockey being short and lightweight; she, she was going to be a nun, no doubt about it. I had never heard of such a thing as wanting to be a nun, not having much knowledge about Catholics, much less nun-ness. She told me everything she knew about nuns and I was spellbound with the idea of chosing poverty and service. She told me stores about famous nuns and nuns she knew personally and how they vowed to be single and in service to the poor and needy. Wow!
As life went on, I soon lost touch with my little Mexican Catholic friend but never ceased to wonder if her ambition became reality. I still wonder about her because her heart was so unwavering in her dream; I don't doubt that she is Sister Catherine somewhere in the world today. Who knows, maybe even "Mother Catherine" by now. And through the years, I have wondered what life as a nun would be like. Obviously, I was inspired by her dedication somewhere deep within myself - she spoke to me from a place that a 10 year old American girl wouldn't even really be aware of - some multidimensional reality, I suppose.
A few years later, I became best friends with aother Catholic girl my age. I confess that I went to confession and did everything she did as a Catholic. I frequented the tiny, adobe Catholic church with her ancient grandmother and even more ancient great aunt as they went to church every single day. When I stayed over, of course, the old ones would insist that we girls came along to pray the rosary and light a candle. If I remember correctly, we didn't have a choice, otherwise, we might have chosen to run around the community and find some boys, but that would have been a sin. My friend was very concerned about sinning although the concept was fairly foreign to me. You see, I wasn't raised in any faith tradition. My mother, although raised and baptized southern baptist, was more of a "seeker" and not a finder. My stepfather had been raised in a religion that was so obscure, there were not any churches (Christian Science). We moved quite a bit or lived in extremely rural areas where just mailing a letter was an entire day affair, much less going to church. My mother would read the Bible now and then, but otherwise, I was a free spirit and a free agent.
As a late teenager, I became more interested in the esoteric, the metaphysical, the extraordinary imaginings that stretched my spiritual beingness to unknown and unfamiliar places. One of my first such encounters was with an elder cousin of mine who called herself wiccan but then gave me a book "The Egyptian Book of the Dead" as well as "The Third Eye." She performed some sort of energy reading on me and announced that my third eye was awakening. I had no clue what she was talking about, but being the curious person I have always been, I read the books.
encounters with metaphysics
teachers, Indian
Beatles and transcendental meditation
wicca
native america
reading lists - cultish, metaphysical, hitchhikers guide, aliens, first encounters, weird and strange news and accountings
urantia
ACIM
pleadians - Hicks -
we live multiple lives simultaneously various dimensions - why not a nun?
if I were to guess how I was living :
nun sisters of the valley growing medicinal plants
working with animals like Jane
professor of -- environmental something or another
like peace pilgrim "love your water as your neighbor"
sojourner truth bookstore van - ? hmmmm
what have i dreamed of that is far from what THIS life has been like?, why can't they be just as real as what I think is real for me now?
maybe more real.
multiverses, new scientic discoveries, multilayered parallel, new astronomical discoveries, planets, galaxies
a wish to hide from this life and live vicariously through another one of my lives ...
why not?
this life has been both blessed but somehow ended up too painful and disappointing. I can intuitively feel my other lives and think them into my "now"
